The clubhouse is the map — tap the shelves, the pile, the TV, the door. Swipe sideways on a phone.
TODAY AT THE CLUBHOUSE••New episode on the TV•3 deals certified
TODAY'S EPISODE
NEWLY CERTIFIED
The standing desk
History, made
“Cheap. You're taller than me.”
New here?
Two birds judge deals. Both have to say yes
for a deal to be certified Frick N' Cheap. Cheap has his own deals, Frick has his picks —
only when they both agree is the deal certified Frick N' Cheap. If nobody likes it, it goes
to the reject pile in the corner.
Both birds. Two yeses. That's the only way onto this shelf — and it's why
there isn't much on it.
CERTIFIED · SEP 19 · HALLOWEEN 100 #4
Inflatable T-Rex costume, adult
Cheap's vote
“Nobody has EVER regretted this. Nobody. Check the comments of any video ever made.”
Frick's vote
“He's right. It's the one costume everyone agrees on. Certified Frick—” “—N' CHEAP!”
Cheap voted yes. Frick did not budge. Not certified — this is Cheap's personal
wall, and he adds to it constantly.
★ CHEAP'S DEALS ★SEASONAL · THROUGH OCT 31
Cheap's Halloween 100 🎃
One hundred things Cheap found for Halloween — candy, decorations, costumes, the giant skeleton — in roughly the order he thought of them. One click each. The counter says how many Frick has ruled on.
Cheap's case
“I found ALL of them. Every single one. Frick has seen one.”
“It's an ASSET. Banks in Italy take these as collateral, Frick — real banks, real vaults, hundreds of thousands of wheels sitting in the dark gaining value.”
Frick's no
“An asset you can eat is called groceries.
...Get the little wedge. We're not a bank.”
Nobody's vote. Still shoppable — we just wouldn't, personally.
✕ REJECT PILE ✕SEP 21 · NO LINK, ON PURPOSE
Cheap's other jersey deal
Cheap's case
“It's almost free. From some turkey outside the arena. Cash. Out of a trunk.”
Frick's ruling
“This goes to the reject pile. No link. We're not sending anybody to that junk.”
There is no button on this card. Frick meant it. The jersey he does want is the five, and that one has its own episode.
✕ REJECT PILE ✕AUG 26
Cold plunge tub
Frick's dismissal
“I'm not a Canada goose.”
Frick's number
“That would have to be half off before I'd even look at it.”
Update: Plunge Chill is currently running 50% off sitewide. That is, technically, Frick's number. He has been informed. The tub stays on the pile until he looks.
Frick wanted 275 pieces of chocolate. Cheap wanted 80 pieces of sour. The candy bird with standards gave in. 57s.
Halloween Has Phases
It's September 4th. Cheap has three pumpkins on the shelf. Frick wants to know where the candy is. 32s.
Four for Four
Olivia Miles went four for four on Rookie of the Month. Frick has one favorite player, and this is why. 50s.
The Early Bird Gets the Decorations
It's September 2nd. Cheap found the Halloween bins. Frick found a reason to stay out of it. 41s.
The Honey Deuce
You're a Free Bird
He Drafted by Cereal
Draft night. Cheap drafted everyone from the commercials. Frick drafted one guy and a defense. 54s.
We Miss You, Dolly
I'm Not a Canada Goose
Cheap has always wanted to try a cold plunge. Frick's whole answer took nine seconds. 9s.
Frick Bought Quiet
Cheap brought home the album from the endcap. Frick was ready. 46s.
The Birds Own a Record Player Now
Cheap buys a $30 turntable. Frick certifies it for a completely different reason. 52s.
Cheap Is Taller Than Frick Now
Cheap demos a standing desk from on top of it. History is made. 54s.
The Pumpkins Are Still Green
He Didn't Even Fight Me
Frick made snacks for the Lynx game. Then came the fastest certification in show history. 59s.
The Chair Reads
Cheap demos an ergonomic chair slightly too hard. 50s.
The Cheese Bank
Cheap attempts to found a cheese bank. Frick concedes the price is fair. 68s.
Frick Has Never Liked Anything. Except Olivia Miles.
The Birds
Meet the birds
Thirty seconds. That's all they need.
Frick is the big green one. He says no. It's not personal — it's just that almost
nothing is actually worth your money, and he's not going to pretend otherwise. When Frick
says yes, that's the product.
Cheap is the small red one with the enormous beak and a pitchman voice three sizes
bigger than his body. He wants everything. He has always wanted everything. He will make
the case for anything.
They've been best friends since they were kids. Every day, deals arrive at their clubhouse
in boxes. Nobody explains why. They judge them.
When a deal gets both votes — certified as a worthy buy by Frick, certified as a
worthy buy by Cheap — it's Certified Frick N' Cheap. One bird's yes gets you on
his personal wall. No votes gets you the pile. The seal can't be bought — but a price
drop has changed a bird's mind before.
Cheap, in his own words
"I want everything — that's not a flaw, that's a WORK ETHIC."
Frick, briefly
"That's the whole system. That's it. That's the video."
NEWLY CERTIFIED